Today we’d like to introduce you to Sarah Apgar.
Sarah, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
I found yoga a few years ago after moving back and forth across the country a couple of times!
When I graduated college, I was so hopeful to travel! I’ve always loved the mountains and hiking so when an opportunity to work towards a Master’s Degree at a small University in Great Falls, Montana presented itself, I had to accept it without hesitation. As an athlete in college, I knew that I wanted to step right into a coaching role as sports have always been an integral part of my life. Playing is how I developed confidence, resilience, and some of the most meaningful friendships — so this seemed like the perfect transition.
What I wasn’t aware of at the time was that I had been struggling with panic attacks for a couple of months before driving across the country. I thought the panic attacks were more of a physical ailment, and that with time they would go away. Unsurprisingly, that didn’t happen and as they continued to develop and occur more frequently I found myself growing increasingly eager to leave Montana.
One of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make was deciding to leave and head back to Boston after the first semester of grad school. I struggled immensely with feelings of shame and failure but knew that staying there would not allow me to figure out what was happening internally.
When I got back to Boston, I sought out therapy and landed in an office with a woman who was also a registered yoga teacher. She was the first person to really encourage me to get on a mat and her confidence in the practice and in my ability to heal eventually led me to try.
I’ll never forget my first class and the sense of peace I felt. I knew immediately that I wanted to teach this practice — to offer people the same sense of love and serenity that my teacher had offered me.
After a few years of continuous practice and very targeted therapy, I have found myself teaching in the same studio that I walked into as a panic-filled twenty-year-old girl a few years prior and I couldn’t be more grateful!
Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
It hasn’t always been a smooth road, but I imagine if it were any other way I wouldn’t be where I am right now, able to do what I love every single day. I think that is the nature of this practice — it’s such a powerful reminder that each and every one of us already has the ingredients that we need to heal within us, no matter what has happened.
One of the most challenging times in my life was working through the trauma that created the panic I had been experiencing. I never really talked about that time in my life and felt, as I’m sure many of us did prior to the #metoo campaign, that it needed to stay that way. What I’ve learned though, is that when we start to talk about our trauma and share our stories, we begin to reclaim our power and encourage others to do the same. It’s this process of showing up and allowing ourselves to be seen, even when we are deep in the muck, that leaves an incredible imprint of strength on our body, mind, and soul.
In those few months of very targeted therapy, I learned a whole lot about human resiliency. Through the support of this practice and the community that it created, I was able to understand and witness the power of putting one foot in front of the other, even when it feels almost impossible to. I’m a firm believer that where there is a struggle, there is a remarkable strength and that it is often in the most challenging moments that we get a glimpse into just how capable we really are. My advice for anyone would be to trust and believe in your own power — and never be afraid to claim it. To remember how much healing can occur just by showing up and allowing yourself to be seen. I think we put so much pressure on ourselves, especially as women, to appear as though we have it all together, all of the time — forgetting that vulnerability is what creates the most powerful connections, not perfection.
Alright – so let’s talk business. Tell us about your business – what should we know?
Right now, I am a graduate student at Lesley University in Cambridge. I’m working towards a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling with a Holistic Specialization and hope to generate research on how implementing yoga and mindfulness into a transitions course for graduating athletes can help develop an identity. Both playing and coaching at the collegiate level have provided me with the opportunity to explore how athletes view themselves, both connected to and separate from their sport. I trust that often times, the transition out of college and away from the identity of ‘athlete’ can be much more challenging for young adults than the transition into academic and athletic competition at this level. I am incredibly passionate about this work and am eager to explore it further.
I also am an assistant soccer coach at Simmons College and could not be prouder of a team. I always find myself feeling grateful for the lessons I am able to learn from and with those girls and am continuously excited to see them succeed both on and off the field.
I am very proud and appreciative to be on this journey and share my experiences through different platforms. Writing has always been an integral part of my life and I often share poems that I refer to as ‘fragments strung together’ as a way to continue developing my own narrative while hopefully encouraging others to do the same.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://loveyourcrazy.wordpress.com
- Email: sapgar3@lesley.edu
- Instagram: sarahapgar_
Image Credit:
Bill Bowman — BOWMAN DESIGN & DIRECTION
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