Today we’d like to introduce you to Eric Michael Cohen.
Eric Michael, can you briefly walk us through your story – how you started and how you got to where you are today.
My wife and I nearly got divorced in a therapist’s office. The therapist wasn’t helping: all she did was make things worse. There had to be another way. Thankfully we found it, and 5 months later we were in better shape than we had been in a decade. Years later, our marriage is even stronger. We disagree all the time, but now we have a way to get through the disagreements without doing emotional damage to each other.
That other way was a system called Relational Life Therapy, a combination between traditional therapy and a more results-oriented coaching approach. Now trained in this system, I often tell my clients, “I don’t care all that much about WHY you’re fighting but I do care deeply about HOW you’re fighting.” Sometimes, what starts the fight is almost insignificant, but how we treat each other once the fight has started is where the damage occurs.
Maybe your partner is a screamer and you respond with passive-aggression. Maybe you complain and your partner withdraws. Whatever the dynamic, most of us end up having the same kind of fight again and again. If we can interrupt that pattern, we end the abuse and restore communication. The skills of RLT also translate into work with individuals. What slows or halts our progress in life is often tied to emotional issues: fear, resentment, self-esteem, etc. If we can break the internal cycle, progress usually follows.
Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
The journey since I started has been quite linear. In contrast to “traditional” marriage counseling, RLT utilizes a repeatable system of skills and tools. The approach is much more educational: I teach you the same things that saved my marriage and then stick with you just long enough to make sure they are being implemented. Once you’ve got it, you won’t need me anymore. So instead of working as a mediator or moderator for years and years, we work together for months and then you “graduate”.
I remember when my wife and I went into our first marriage therapy appointment years ago, I was thinking to myself, “did we get a good one?” We did not. In contrast, I know that part of the success might come from my skill but most of it comes from the amazing and results-oriented system I’ve been trained in.
Please tell us about The Life Lab Coaching Studio – Marriage & Relationship Repair – Life, Career & Business Coaching.
I think of my business as being split into two parts:
-Marriage & Relationship Repair
I work with couples, parents and their adult children, adult siblings, business partners and family businesses. Most of the work is with couples. Things I often see are issues around infidelity, blended families, money, trust, addiction, lack of or dysfunctional communication, and loss of intimacy.
-Life, Career & Business Coaching
Often, the same roadblocks we had when we were young stay with us well into adulthood. Those roadblocks take many forms; a tendency to second guess ourselves; fear of failure; fear of success; lack of direction; lack of passion; procrastination; etc. etc.. When we can (together) identify and understand what it is that holds us back, as well as where it came from and how to overcome it, amazing things happen.
We are all the same “human” species. While some of us may be more passionate and others may be more cerebral, there are some fundamental truths and consistencies to how we are wired. I am humbled and honored to be able to explain this to others. For example: in relationships, there are really only two kinds of wounds: wounds of attack/invasion and wounds of abandonment/neglect. And it is quite common if one partner is feeling attacked it is because the other partner is feeling neglected. To be able to share the paradigms of human interactional psychology is one of the great joys of this work.
Do you look back particularly fondly on any memories from childhood?
I really liked Legos, lol.
- Couples work: $100-$125/hr
- Individual work: $90-$125/hr
- Address: 1A Thayer Ave Braintree, MA 02184
- Website: www.thelifelabcoachingstudio.com
- Phone: 781-356-2876
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thelifelabcoachingstudio/